Seeing vs. Knowing: Why I’m Not a Clairvoyant
Have you ever tried to fit into a role that just didn’t feel right? For the longest time, I believed I had to be clairvoyant to fully embrace my spiritual path. I poured my energy, time, and hard-earned money into developing abilities that never quite clicked, hoping for clarity but finding only doubt.
Determined to unlock my supposed clairvoyant potential, I enrolled in a well-known clairvoyance school, convinced that structured training and expert guidance would help me develop my abilities. I thought that if I found the right mentor, they would teach me everything I needed to know. While this may be the right approach for some, it turned out to be completely wrong for me.
At first, that doubt felt like failure—a sign that I was on the wrong path. But as I leaned into it, something unexpected happened. That doubt became the doorway to a deeper truth, one that changed everything. I wasn’t a clairvoyant at all—I was something else entirely.
I have always prided myself on being highly intuitive, with a strong sense of knowing. As a professional tarot reader, I use this intuition to deliver direct and powerful messages to those who seek guidance. I never labeled myself a clairvoyant or a psychic—just intuitive, and sometimes an empath.
Beyond my intuition, I also have an extremely strong "bullshit detector" as I call it, something I’ve always trusted. Unfortunately, that instinct became painfully useful when I started my clairvoyance training. My inner knowing kept poking at me, whispering: What the hell are you doing? Why are you faking this? Why are you trying so hard to fit into a box when you’ve spent your whole life thinking outside of them?
“With every forced meditation session, I felt like I was losing my spiritual mojo“
The approach was too rigid and shallow for me. I was told, Just open up, ask your guides, and receive the messages, Mariia. But that oversimplified and formulaic way of accessing insight didn’t resonate with me. Instead of deepening my connection to spirit, it made me feel disconnected, unworthy, and like a fraud.
I found myself lying awake at night, spiraling into self-doubt. If everyone is a clairvoyant, as these schools love to claim, why am I struggling so much? Why am I the only one who feels like an outsider? I thought that if I just practiced harder, meditated more, and “did it the right way,” I would finally get it. But if a shoe doesn’t fit, no amount of forcing it will make it comfortable.
From Seeking a Mentor to Becoming My Own
I won’t name the school or the teacher because this isn’t about “exposing” them—it’s about my personal journey and learning to trust my own inner knowing. The program offered a meditation-based approach that resonates with many, and I acknowledge its value for those who connect with that method. However, I eventually realized that my path called for a different approach—one that not only aligned more naturally with my intuitive abilities but also resonated with my deep-rooted interest in occult practices and esoteric wisdom.
Ironically, what the program subtly revealed to me was that I already possessed psychic abilities—just not in the way their curriculum defined them. I am a channel for receiving messages, but I don’t need to go through rigid meditation steps, chakra activations, or “step into my light” to do so. I do it naturally, effortlessly, just as I always have.
Some of my classmates were undoubtedly incredibly gifted and shared insightful messages with me during our training sessions. But nothing they told me was something I didn’t already know. That was another clue—one I didn’t recognize at the time.
The Epiphany: Hey! That’s my Kind of Clair!
The biggest revelation came outside of the classroom, completely unplanned. I saw a friend describe herself as a “clairsentient tarot reader”, and even though I had read about the different “clairs” before, this time something profoundly clicked. I started researching deeper into the different types of intuitive abilities.
That’s when I found it—the last one on the list: Clairgnostic.
I didn’t even need to read the definition to know that this was me. I just knew. And when I did read about it, every word resonated deeply. Everything made sense.
I am not a clairvoyant. I am not a fraud. I am not “doing it wrong.” I am, and always have been, a clairgnostic. I’m still new to the term and learning how to embrace, work with it, expand my understanding of it and truly own it as I continue on my path.
The Difference Between Clairvoyance and Clairgnosticism: Seeing vs. Knowing
Clairvoyance and clairgnosticism are often confused, but they function in entirely different ways.
Clairvoyance is the ability to receive psychic messages through visual imagery. Clairvoyants often see symbols, people, colors, or entire scenes in their mind’s eye that provide insight. These visions may be literal or metaphorical, requiring interpretation to fully understand the message. For example, a clairvoyant might see an image of a locked door when doing a reading, symbolizing that someone feels blocked in their life and needs to find a key to move forward.
Clairgnosticism, in contrast, is a direct, immediate knowing. It is not dependent on visual imagery, symbols, or auditory messages. Instead of seeing a locked door, a clairgnostic would simply know that the person feels trapped and might even instantly sense what they need to do to move forward. There is no deciphering or interpreting of external signals—only an inherent understanding that emerges from within.
Unlike clairvoyance, clairgnosticism does not rely on meditation, visualization, or external prompts. It is an entirely internal process that often defies explanation, making it difficult to articulate to others. Many clairgnostics hold back from sharing their insights simply because they cannot logically explain how they know what they know. The knowledge comes suddenly, feeling undeniable—yet just as quickly, doubt creeps in, making it hard to trust this knowing without validation. Some hesitate to express their insights, fearing skepticism from others or even from themselves. But over time, as repeated confirmations reinforce their inner knowing, most learn to trust its accuracy and embrace this gift with confidence.
The Different Clairs: Understanding Intuitive Abilities
Beyond clairvoyance and clairgnosticism, there are several other intuitive abilities, each functioning in its own unique way:
Clairsentience (clear feeling): The ability to physically or emotionally feel the energies, emotions, or even physical pain of people, places, or spirits.
Clairaudience (clear hearing): Receiving intuitive information through inner or external auditory messages, such as hearing voices, whispers, or sounds.
Claircognizance (clear knowing): A sudden mental download of information without any prior knowledge or logical explanation.
Clairalience (clear smelling): The ability to perceive psychic messages through scent, such as smelling a deceased loved one’s perfume or the aroma of a place with spiritual significance.
Clairgustance (clear tasting): Receiving intuitive messages through taste, often linked to memories or spirits trying to communicate.
Some people may experience one of these abilities more strongly, while others may have a mix of several. It's common for individuals to develop more than one clair, combining them to enhance their intuitive readings and practices.
The Problem with Labels in the Spiritual Community
One thing I have come to realize on this journey is how much the spiritual community loves labels. Everyone, including myself, wants to categorize themselves—clairvoyant, clairsentient, empath, psychic, medium. While these labels can be helpful in understanding our abilities, they can also be limiting and even harmful.
Labels create expectations. They tell us how we are supposed to experience our gifts, and if we don’t fit neatly into those categories, we may feel like frauds or start to doubt our gifts. I spent months doubting myself because I didn’t fit the clairvoyant mold, when in reality, I had my own unique way of accessing knowledge.
While I now embrace the term clairgnostic, I also know that labels are just that—words. What matters most is the experience, the knowing, and the way we use our gifts to help ourselves and others. There is profound peace in recognizing that we belong somewhere, but true spiritual growth comes when we allow ourselves to simply be without rigid definitions.
My Path: Witchy, Occult, and Knowledge-Hungry
Unlike the structure of my clairvoyance school, my own path is deeply witchy, occult, and knowledge-driven. I don’t want surface-level spirituality—I crave depth, theory, and the esoteric history behind mystical practices. My journey is one of exploration and discovery, where I continuously seek out ancient wisdom, hidden truths, and the intricate connections between different mystical traditions. I am drawn to unraveling the complexities of magick, understanding its roots, and integrating its principles into my own evolving spiritual practice.
“My journey is not about simply receiving messages and passing them on; it’s about understanding them, deconstructing them, and weaving them into my craft”
I immerse myself in all sorts of “weird” texts, studying everything from ancient folk witch practices to Human Design, from divination systems to ritualistic spellwork. My curiosity knows no bounds, and I thrive on uncovering hidden wisdom and lost knowledge. I believe that true spiritual power comes not from blindly following a prescribed method but from learning, experimenting, and forging a path that feels right for me.
I practice a form of intuitive magick, blending elements from multiple traditions to create a practice that is both deeply personal and effective. Instead of rigidly adhering to one system, I take what resonates and discard what doesn't. This has allowed me to build a unique approach to spirituality that aligns with my natural clairgnostic abilities.
Rather than relying on external validation or predefined structures, I trust my inner knowing to guide me. Whether I am interpreting tarot cards, working with spellwork, or crafting a sigil, my process is always fueled by both intuition and intellect. I honor my instincts while also grounding my practice in historical and theoretical knowledge, bridging the gap between the mystical and the intellectual.
Ultimately, my path is about empowerment—both my own and that of others. Through tarot, teaching, community building and rituals, I aim to help people tap into their own wisdom and reclaim their spiritual authority.
Even though we are not all clairvoyant, we are all capable of accessing profound insight; we just need to trust ourselves enough to listen.
